| Rabbi’s Corner – The Power of words
“Sticks and Stones may break my bones but words can never harm me”
Like many people I grew up with this expression. But is it true?
Words may just be mere breath but they convey meaning and can touch the deepest part of our selves.
Evidence shows that the words spoken to us especially when we are young and impressionable can have a lasting impact both positive or negative.
Words of encouragement and praise empower and words of abuse and toxicity can crush a person.
In the work environment a manager has a position of power to build those under his charge and motivate them or God forbid to destroy their confident by micro-management and destructive criticism.
Not only are the words we utter powerful but the way we deliver them can make a huge difference ; the tone of voice, body language and the general environment and context in which they are delivered.
So how can we be more careful with our words?
The sages tech us “Words that emerge from the heart enter the heart”.
Authenticity is key to impacting others.
Before we speak we must think about the other person in a holistic way; their situation and personalities and so forth.
In Eshet Chayil King Solomon praises the woman “The law of loving-kindness is on her tongue”
This must be the overriding principal that governs our speech.
We must sometimes stand up for what is right and justice which may require firmness but this is not to be mixed up with self-righteous egotism and virtue signaling that we see so much of today.
The Mitzvot we can do with our words is endless.
Calling a friend to provide a listening ear, hope support and sharing joy can be life saving.
We never know what is truly going on in another person’s inner world. Taking a real interest in another person and speaking positively can change their day and sometimes even the course of their life!
Parshat Mattos begins with the laws of Oaths and Vows which relates to speech with the following verse:
“If a man makes a vow to the Lord or makes an oath to prohibit himself, he shall not violate his word; according to whatever came out of his mouth, he shall do.”
The Hebrew for “he shall not violate” – “Lo Yachel” relates to the word Chullin which means secular. Rashi citing an ancient Midrash Sifrei states “he shall not treat his word as being unholy”.
This applies in the context of a promise made but I would like to suggest that we can learn a general spiritual lesson about all our speech- that is has the potential for holiness or its opposite.
By holiness I mean lifting up our words to make them creative and useful, uplifting and inspiring.
Let’s challenge ourselves to be more mindful with our speech and may we merit to use our speech to connect to others and Hashem on the deepest of levels.
Shabbat shalom. |
